The Wallace Tearoom Lanark 2013

Lanark is a little touristy town in Scotland with a populace of around 8000, and is cosily nestled in the Clyde Valley. Which allows for beautiful scenery and Scotland's usual confused weather system. The town is home to the famous rallying family the McRaes (Jimmy, Alister and the late Colin), William Smellie the obstetrician and John Glaister the forensic scientist. Lanark is also to blame for a plethora of football stars: Robert (Rab) Douglas, Stephen McManus, Walter Ferguson Smith, Henry George Smith, Lee Adamson Miller, Douglas "Dougie" Imrie, Stephen Paul Pearson and Darren Lee Smith, Stewart Greacen.

It has been visited by many notables over the centuries including King James the II, III and the IV, Queen Elizabeth II and Prince Philip, and of course it is were William Wallace killed the Sherriff of Lanark and started the War of Independence (Inaccurately portrayed in Braveheart ). Has its own Loch and local market as well as a modernised Memorial Hall large enough to have housed several big bands over the years.

The Tearoom of my School days (vanished in the ether of time) was Daisies, close to the school and with a second hand book shop next door. Over a decade after my last visit, it had been bought over, refurbished into a biker friendly tearoom named The Wallace Tearooms.

We're The Millers... Mad Cap Capers ~ Cinema Review

I was lucky enough to see a free early screening of We're The Millers through Show Film First. Starring Jennifer Aniston and Jason Sudeikis the film is the story of a robbed drug dealer falling on hard times and being coerced into smuggling a 'smidge' of weed from Mexico. Having great distate for happy families in general he is forced into the father role to ease border crossings. The mother role in this family falls to his neighbouring stripper (Jennifer Aniston), and his loving children are a stroppy homeless girl (Emma Roberts), and innocently gawky virgin (Will Poulter).
Released in the UK on the 23rd of August, it is a comic mix of The Hangover style and obvious innuendo. A feel good road trip plot with all the expected hiccups along the way, from the trailer alone you can clearly see how this is going to pan out into the stereotypical happy ending. However this film has a distinct emphasis on drugs (Big shocker there!) and a few unexpected surprise scenes along the way.

Musical Memories ~ Rhianna/ Diamonds

Sometimes in our life there's a song that epitomises a moment in our lives. A moment, that lives forever in the lyrics and hauntingly reminds you of that one memory. A sad break up song played on repeat, the song that was playing when love first found a couple, or a simple song hearkening from your childhood happiness. Usually its a current song, or dating from old mix tapes, but recently I've realised this isn't always the case.

Rhianna might be famous for her irritatingly repetitive lyrics (Just buy another umbrella already!), but from her seventh album came a unwitting surprise for me. Tuning into 'Diamonds', I found myself lost in a memory. I would normally just shrugged it off but every time I hear the song it takes me back 15 years to the same moment. Its a beautiful thing that a track can become part of my past.

Pain and Gain... Muscle Madness ~ Cinema Review

A bit of a belated blog post; but on Tuesday I was lucky enough to see a free early screening of Pain and Gain through Show Film First and Paramount Pictures  (18 days before release!). Starring Mark Wahlberg, Dwayne Johnson and Anthony Mackie the film follows three bodybuilders who decide to branch out into kidnapping to realise their American Dream. 
The true story of The Sun Gym Gang, is much harsher than the film shows, but considering most people would struggle to believe it is true. Micheal Bay directed, in a departure from his Transformers fame, through the minefield of comedy into the realm of bizarre reality.
If you've some how missed the trailer, then I shall enlighten you  with it here.

Brentwood Council vs TOWIE : Battle of the Scantily Clad!

Well hello, you deliciously avid readers, it seems to be a slow month for product testing. Hence for a time I shall inflict my opinions on you and I dare say lose a few followers into the bargain. Whilst my opinion is not always the most thought out (or reasonable), it is still mine, and often mine alone. If something sparks an interest, feel free to comment. Your honest views are welcome, Though please be aware and considerate of my younger blog readers in your speech. Thank you.

Obviously I live nowhere near Essex and in addition I have no interest in 'The Only Way Is Essex'  'The Only Way Is Essex'. To the extent that I had to be told that 'TOWIE' was actually the same program. So this news story from the Daily Mail should have had no impact on me. However the headline 'Council considers fare discount for 'scantily clad girls' to stop them being attacked' intrigued me. Reading further into the story and conflicting opinions, I found my bra burning feminist kicking her unshaven legs in anger.

"Lads Mags"... Taboo Territory?

Well it's been a while since I bothered you all with a blog post, especially one concerning my personal viewpoint! I'm sorry to say the headlines are irritating me again, this time its the elitist sensitivities of complainers.

Supermarkets have issued an ultimatum on 'Lad's Mag's' telling them to cover up or force being banned from the shelves. As far back as I can remember the top shelf of any magazine rack was dedicated to the perversion that is the human body, and supermarkets only stocked the more modest of these ranges. Yet it seems that the female human form is offensive to women and children.

This entire fiasco deals with women objecting to the female form being put on display. For myself the irony is inescapable and frankly inexcusable. In an age where supermodels are too thin and the obese dangerously unhealthy, women everywhere have campaigned for the female form to be revered in all shapes and sizes. Yet at the same time it is offensive and disgusting. Male 'hunks' can be oiled and posed on a beach for female viewing, but do that to a woman and the women are up in arms? It is little wonder women are considered confusing by men.